Traditional Vietnamese Wedding: A Cultural Treasure

Traditional Vietnamese Wedding: A Cultural Treasure

In the rich and diverse culture of Vietnam, the traditional wedding ceremony stands as one of the most vivid reflections of national identity. From formal rituals to profound spiritual values, each step in the wedding process highlights respect for family, ancestors, and society. This article delves deeper into the essential rites of the traditional Vietnamese wedding, exploring the cultural significance and values they represent. Through this lens, we gain a deeper understanding of the timeless beauty in the spiritual life of the Vietnamese people throughout history.

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The Betrothal Ceremony

This is one of the most important rituals. For this ceremony to take place, the groom's family must first choose an auspicious day and inform the bride's family of their visit. Once the bride's family agrees to this friendly meeting between the two families, the following events can proceed smoothly and harmoniously.

This ceremony marks the first official meeting between the groom's and bride's families. During this meeting, they will discuss and agree on the wedding date, betrothal gifts, and the bride's family's expectations regarding the organization and services required for the upcoming ceremonies.

The offerings for the betrothal ceremony are quite simple and typically include: ten betel leaves and areca nuts, tea, cigarettes, and sweets in even numbers for the bride's family to offer to their ancestors.

Sequence of the Betrothal Ceremony

Attendees: It is a private affair between both families, including the bride, groom, their parents, and the bride's and groom's siblings.

The betrothal ceremony begins with the bride's family welcoming the groom's family. They prepare tea, cigarettes, sweets, fruits, and other refreshments to serve their guests. The groom's family then presents their offerings to the bride's family, who in turn places these gifts on the ancestral altar and lights incense to honor their ancestors.

Afterward, both families sit together to discuss the selection of an auspicious date and other preparations for the engagement and wedding ceremonies. Following this ceremony, the bride is considered to be officially engaged.

Betrothal Gifts

Depending on regional customs, the offerings presented by the groom's family may vary:

The Engagement Ceremony

This ceremony serves as the official announcement between both families regarding the betrothal of the bride.

During the engagement ceremony, the procedures for the engagement, marriage proposal, and the dowry are carried out on the same day. The groom's family brings the offerings to the bride's family, which typically include 30 bunches of betel leaves and the engagement trays.

After the parents of both families introduce the attendees, the groom's mother presents the 30 bunches of betel leaves.

The first set of betel leaves is used for the engagement ritual, the second set for the marriage proposal, and the final set for the dowry ceremony.

Next comes the ritual where the bride's family receives the engagement trays from the groom's family. The number of trays is odd, typically 5, 7, 9, or 11, and the items inside the trays must be in even numbers. Common items in the engagement trays include bánh cốm (green sticky rice cake), bánh xu xê (husband-and-wife cake), lotus seed sweets, tea, wine, betel leaves and areca nuts, cigarettes, and sometimes sticky rice and roast pork.

The Sequence of the Engagement Ceremony
 
 The food offerings brought by the groom’s family will be partially taken by the bride’s family, while the betel leaves and areca nuts are placed on the ancestral altar for incense burning. Additionally, the bride’s family keeps two portions of the food, returning the rest to the groom’s family.

Finally, the bride and groom will formally introduce themselves to both families, offering tea and betel leaves to the guests.

The time between the engagement ceremony and the wedding depends on the selected date, as agreed upon by both families.

Engagement Ceremony Offerings

The offerings brought by the groom’s family vary depending on regional customs. In Northern Vietnam, the number of trays is usually odd (3, 5, 7, or 9), while in Southern Vietnam, the number of trays is even (4, 6, 8, or 10).

However, the basic engagement offerings across all three regions typically include: a tray of betel leaves and areca nuts, a tray of wine, tea, cigarettes, a tray of engagement cakes, a fruit tray, a tray of lotus seed sweets, a tray of sticky rice, and a tray of roast pork. Specifically:

This is one of the most significant events for the bride and groom. During this ceremony, both families invite guests to celebrate with food and well-wishes.

The bride's family will host an event one day before the wedding ceremony. At this gathering, both the bride and groom will be present, and the food served to the guests will consist of savory dishes.

The groom's family typically organizes the wedding ceremony at their home or at a restaurant or hotel. If the ceremony is held at home, both families must discuss and plan in advance for the bride's welcoming ceremony, the ancestral rites, and the greetings between the two families. They will serve tea to both families and, finally, take commemorative photographs.

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Sequence of the Marriage Ceremony at Home

On the chosen auspicious day and time, the groom, along with relatives who have been invited, will go to the bride's house, bringing a flower car and wedding flowers to pick up the bride. The bride will be beautifully and splendidly made up in her wedding dress, while the groom typically wears a formal and elegant suit.

The Wedding Ceremony at the Bride's House

The groom's family will arrive at the bride's house, where both families will introduce the attendees. Following this, they will present betel leaves to request the bride's hand and ask for permission for the groom to go up to the room to receive the bride.

Afterward, the bride and groom will perform the ancestral rites at the bride's house, and the groom's family will ask for permission to take the bride back to their home. The bride's family representatives will agree to let the groom’s family escort the bride.

The Wedding Ceremony at the Groom's House

Upon bringing the bride to the groom's house, the bride and groom will light incense at the ancestral altar of the groom's family.

Next, a representative from the groom's family will give a few words of welcome to the guests from both families. The groom will lead the bride to greet his mother, acknowledge the guests from both sides, exchange gifts, and then celebrate with a savory banquet along with a cultural performance that has been prepared.

The Sequence of the Wedding Ceremony at the Hotel

Both families will arrive at the hotel 30 minutes before the guests are invited. The bride will get her makeup done and wear her wedding dress in the waiting room. Family members from both sides will help each other tidy up their outfits and check the offerings. Afterward, the bride and groom, along with their parents, will welcome the guests.

During the ceremony, the hotel or the family will have prepared an MC in advance. Representatives from both families, along with the bride and groom, will take the stage to introduce themselves to everyone. After that, they will raise their glasses to toast and move from table to table, sharing their joy with the guests.

Finally, the parents from both sides, along with the bride and groom, will thank the guests for attending as they gather at the entrance of the hotel.

Conclusion

From the North to the South, traditional weddings in Vietnam showcase the diversity and richness of the nation's culture. Each region has its own customs, rituals, and organizational styles, reflecting the cultural identity and lifestyle of its people. In Northern Vietnam, the ceremonies are often conducted with formality, emphasizing traditional procedures such as the betrothal and engagement ceremonies with significant offerings. Central Vietnam stands out with local customs that blend tradition with cultural exchange. Meanwhile, Southern Vietnam is characterized by a more festive atmosphere, with rituals that tend to be less formal than in the North but still maintain warmth and intimacy. Despite these differences, all traditional weddings across the three regions share a common theme: respect for family, love, and the happiness of the couple on their momentous day. 

 "With its rich traditions and picturesque settings, Vietnam is an ideal destination for wedding filmmakers. At Filming Fixer in Vietnam, we are dedicated to helping you create unforgettable cinematic experiences that honor the beauty of Vietnamese culture.